Week Three PIcks

I was 12-4 last week. Eat that.

Alright bitches...week three picks are in. As per my boasting last week, you have the opportunity to submit your own if you want, but face it, you can't beat me. Without further adieu...

Cleveland v Baltimore
Drew Carey was full of shit. Baltimore.

Washington v Detroit
How the hell does Washington get to play St Louis and Detroit back to back? Whatever, Washington wins back to back.

Jacksonville v Houston
I picked against Houston last week, and Matt Schaub took a dump on my face for my efforts. Houston

Atlanta v New England
Even with a Steelers loss last week, I had a smile on my face thanks to the J...E...T...S JETS JETS JETS!! New England's defense is shitty. Wes Welker is back, but Brady sucks. Atlanta wins.

Green Bay v St. Louis
I like to think of St. Louis as a haven for those who don't want to lose two games in a row. Aaron Rodgers will learn that in about 10 seconds. Green Bay.

New York Giants v Tampa Bay
I've got Brandon Jacobs on my fantasy team. Thank goodness, Jacobs runs wild. Giants.

Tennessee v New York Jets
J...E...T...S JETS JETS JETS!!

Kansas City v Philadelphia
Mike Vick is back...dogs beware. Philadelphia goes back home to New Jersey with a win this week.

San Francisco v Minnesota
I hate the NFC West, and I know I'm not alone. Brett Favre is a media whore, however, Minnesota.

New Orleans v Buffalo
Until the Saints are held below 200 points per minute I'll pick against them. Until then, Buffalo sucks. New Orleans.

Chicago v Seattle
I hate Jeff Reed. Chicago.

Denver v Oakland
Hey Josh McDaniels, how's life without Jay Cutler? Bitch. Oakland.

Miami v San Diego
Actually, this is a tough one to pick. I'll take San Diego because surely Miami can't hold the ball for 38 minutes like they did against the Colts. What, they ran for over 300 yards and lost that game? Wow, that's shitty. Karma's a bitch, I'll take Miami.

Indianapolis v Arizona
I'll be surprised if the score isn't 205-602 by the end of the first half. Peyton Manning is no David Garrard, the Colts to win.

Carolina v Dallas
Hey Jerry, how about that grand opening to your billion dollar stadium? What? Money can't buy a winning team? (Well, not in the NFL. Ask the Red Sox-Yankees what it's like.) But, I'll still take America's Assclowns to win this week. Dallas.

Pittsburgh v Cincinnati
Come on "offensive" line, let's get that running game going. Pittsburgh.